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Last Updated on Thursday, October 22, 2020 by Midlands Maidens
End of Year Report and 2019 New Years Resolutions
Welcome to our annual end of year report, which this year adds a few ‘New Years Resolutions’ that we are looking at adding.
The 2018 End of Year Report
Best place to start here is with the STATISTICS page, which contains all of the details in full.
Since we started publishing our statistics back in April, we have had nearly 1.5 million page views from almost 310.000 individual website visitors.
We regularly get in excess of 500 individual visits per day, with those knocking up around 1,500 to 2,000 page views between them.
At present, the 404 page has amassed the most visits, due to people having bookmarked those escorts’ pages that have been removed. We can see this figure rising into the New Year, for reasons that will become apparent later on.
Our AMP website is already proving popular with mobile visitors, regularly getting 50% of the page totals.
This is the main reason that our individual page and post totals have dropped a little, as whilst the total of visitors remains the same, there is no way as yet that we can get the AMP pages integrated to show the AMP totals.
This is not something that we’re particularly bothered about at present, as all figures can be viewed from Google Analytics – and we don’t feel that a major upheaval of the website would be in anyone’s interests.
We also created our Independent Escorts Directory where escorts from all walks of life began to realise that there is no demand for their type of escorting due to them having a bad name from other quarters and not doing any services.
Better that than us trying to have to sell them, eh?
The general consensus we’ve received from clients is ‘why shop at Poundland when you’re on the doorstep of Harrods?’
Before we leave the end of year report, we thought we’d throw a few gallery photos in from our good friends at Sex.com:
So that’s the end of year report for 2018, now it’s time to ring in the changes with our New Year Resolutions.
New Year Resolutions for 2019
One of the main issues we’ve had in our end of year report is the shocking way that girls seem to disappear at the weekends, or develop selective hearing problems.
As mentioned at the end of year report earlier, our first resolution is to take care of this problem in rather dramatic fashion, by getting rid of any staff member that is not pulling their weight due to hearing problems or to weekend razzle commitments.
Expect this decimation to take place within the next few days.
Due to the elite status of our escorts, we have decided that those girls who stay will be getting a rather hefty pay-rise.
Transport costs, living standards and advertising costs have all gone up in the past few years, and we thought that rather than cling onto mid-1980s rates for escorts, we’d give the girls a rise that brings them quite firmly into the 21st century.
We again set the trend and standards for this by only having the finest escorts you can hire on our website, and we thought it was about time that the girls’ potential was realised.
Having had a rather successful Christmas period using our new rates, and many customers commenting that the service received was excellent, we are going to be raising the cost for any appointment made to £200 for the first hour.
Subsequent hours and extended appointments will stay the same as they are now.
This will have the effect of weeding out the skinflints and UKPunting users who detest paying more than £30 for an appointment and placing the appointment to see a truly elite girl beyond their reach.
The aforementioned users now have a real choice in either using a cheap slapper from VivaStreet or AdultWork and then moaning about them when they lost £30:
– or putting their money where their mouth is and hiring a REAL escort with REAL services!
With the upcoming decimation of girls from Midlands Maidens Nottingham Escorts, we are under no disillusions that we are going to be needing new girls to work for us.
With that in mind, we are changing the interview format slightly.
Over the holidays, we were able to launch a DISCORD server that will now allow interviews from the comfort of your own home via a live video call, which again brings us firmly into the 21st century!
DISCORD has a mobile app that can be used on all iPhones and Android phones, so even if you’ve not got a PC there is no excuse for you not applying.
The original format for interviews will remain of course – the format where you need to arrange a time to meet, struggle to get there for the allocated time, get the drinks in (we’ll miss that one), make apologies for being late (we WON’T miss that one), and wonder if you’ve been successful – but using a live video chat will remove ALL of that.
We were looking at using Skype too, but the call quality over Discord is far superior, plus the anonymity that so many escorts prefer to use is hugely increased. We’ll do a run-down on Discord in a future blog post so that we’re all singing from the same page.
We hope that you’ve enjoyed reading our 2018 end of year report, and the New Year Resolutions that we are looking to bring in.
Some people reading it will assume that we’ve been rather elitist in our views on booking escorts, and others will say that we’ve put making an appointment to meet an escort beyond their reach.
To those people we say this – Midlands Maidens Nottingham Escorts is STILL the most cost-effective agency in Nottingham even with the price rise, as all services and transportation are ALL INCLUSIVE in the price.
To those that still aren’t happy, enjoy your booking with the VivaStreet or AdultWork cheap slappers!
We wish all of our customers, past, present and future, a Happy New Year!