The Midlands Maidens guaranteed wage was announced a few days ago. Here are the guaranteed wage essentials needed to join us.
Since throwing this new wage structure over to recent interviewees, we’ve been inundated with new applicants.
Out of every 10 or so, we estimate that only 1-2 are good to go regarding our other applicant requirements.
The Midlands Maidens Guaranteed Wage was introduced so that any girl coming into this lucrative industry needn’t have to worry about her popularity with our customers. If for some reason we get it wrong (which we don’t), you will get the full fee for one appointment, per week, paid out of our own pockets.
With interviews starting next week, here are the main requirements that need to be met by new applicants, either experienced or inexperienced, as regards our guaranteed wage essentials:
1) Scrub Up Well:
NOBODY and especially our clients, are going to ask, or expect to see someone in tracky-bottoms turning up at their home, or at their hotel.
It is very likely therefore that anyone turning up to their interview in tracky tops, bottoms, or fully suited like the next Nike chav will not be interviewed.
No trackies or shell suits allowed EVER!
We also do not expect interviewees to turn up in luminous boob tubes with 9″ heels and twangers as the interview will be held in a public place.
Nice, but hardly appropriate for a public interview.
Smart but casual is the order of the day here – no excuses – as your interview time will have already been discussed with you.
You should turn up for your interview, smartly and prettily dressed as though you were going to meet a client at his house or hotel room.
2) Bring a Photo ID:
It’s long been a rule at Midlands Maidens, that any applicant under 25 years of age should bring some sort of photo id of themselves, to prove that they are not someone’s 14-year-old daughter.
We accept driving licenses (full and provisional), passports and UK citizen cards, any of which should be carried to prove your age if going into a pub or club for instance.
Without a photo id, we will be unable to carry out your interview, as without one you will not be able to prove that you are over 18 years of age.
A photo id to prove that you are over 18 is essential.
3) Guaranteed Wage Essentials – Your Phone:
Your phone must NOT be a Pay As You Go (PAYG) phone, and you should ensure that you have at least a couple of hours of talk time on your contract.
The reason for this was discussed in The Problem with Teens post, which is shown below:
The Problem With Teens
Midlands Maidens were again reminded of the problem with teens working in this industry, following an interview this week.
At the time of writing this post, Virgin Mobile have a Black Friday deal, where you can get unlimited calls, unlimited texts and 6GB of data for £5.95 – plus free use of Whatsapp and other social networks included in the monthly tariff.
Our full reasoning behind only accepting contract phones will be explained at your interview.
4) Guaranteed Wage Essentials – Your Benefits:
What you will get when successfully applying for a staff position at Midlands Maidens:
Big cash rewards
A Midlands Maidens GUARANTEED wage
Total discretion
Choose your own hours to work (within reason)
We manage all your bookings and advertising
Advertised on a professional website
Faces blurred (at your request) to protect your anonymity
No upfront costs, payments made directly to you, on or prior to your appointments
Security procedures in place
Friendly approachable management
Extensive knowledge of the industry
Fantastic clients
Great earning potential
Drug-free agency
Previous successful applicants have included:
Ex-employees of two of the three emergency services,
Secretaries,
Office workers,
Students,
Athletes,
Front-of-house zero-hours employees,
Delivery drivers,
…all of whom have given up on their previous chosen fields to come into this lucrative industry, as well as girls that are out of work and ‘girls least likely to succeed’.
All girls whether they are ex-police commissioners down to ex-benefit claimants are treated in exactly the same way when starting out and will eventually find that new type of ‘buzzing’ in their new careers.
Here’s to your success, and we’ll look forward to inviting you onboard very soon!
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