We've been hanging on... and hanging on... but still no worthy contenders for the Christmas TV ads this year - they're all rubbish.
Last Updated on Wednesday, November 18, 2020 by Midlands Maidens
Looks like COVID19 is doing the rounds again, but we think that we’ve found the ideal solution with our Midlands Maidens sex bubble.
Before that though, we’re going to be evil and show you what you’re missing out on 🙂
If you’re viewing this website on a PC or laptop (mobile is coming soon), you’ll have noticed by now on the homepage, that there’s a notification bar at the bottom, showing you the girls and a few other pages that are being looked at.
From Sunday 18th October, the notification bar is now available on mobile phones.
This has been instrumental in boosting calls to the office by at least 50%, as viewers realise that the girl they were perving over might be going out on a booking.
A wonderful and evil new toy, immediately loved by everyone in the office, that will be coming to mobiles and a few other pages soon!
The Midlands Maidens Sex Bubble
Ok then, onto the big news of the week, and we’ll let BOJO introduce it:
Sorry, that didn’t make much sense, so we’ll go back to Downing Street for an official announcement which makes things crystal clear on how to implement the Midlands Maidens sex bubble:
First things first – if you’ve scrolled down expecting the above video to stop, please go back and ‘pause’ it, otherwise you’ll get a load more waffle on Coronavirus issues – more commonly known as ‘fake news’.
Didn’t make much sense either, did it?
Aside from more waffle, that between the lines clearly states that you can go to Barnard Castle for an eye-test, no more information at all was given out.
We’ve decided to take the reigns on this latest issue and form our own ‘support bubbles’ with selected clients, which makes it virtually impossible for nob-heads out on the piss to get a booking.
Firstly – there will be no bookings taken from nob-heads out on the piss.
Secondly – there will be no bookings taken from clients in high-risk areas, which include areas around university campuses, such as Beeston, Lenton Sands, Radford, and any of the City Centre student flats complexes.
Thirdly – our girls will become even more selective on the clients that they visit, knowing that each one of these clients could be a part of their ‘extended sex bubble’.
What is an extended ‘sex bubble’?
We’ve decided to minimise the risk of COVID19 by administering our own support bubbles, or in the case of an escort worker, our own sex bubbles.
All of the girls that are working presently on our staff list (those that are not self isolating or hiding from the fake news COVID virus), have a selection of regular clients.
These clients have been vetted very closely (but nicely) to ensure that they are not living with anyone who might pass on this ‘virus’ to our girls, minimising completely the chances of our girls catching anything and passing it on to other clients.
The girls are already naturally proficient at this procedure with their views towards ‘safe sex’, and one of the girls came in the other night and remarked that ‘it’s a bit like wearing an all-over condom int it’?
Applications – have had to take a back seat whilst all of this is going on, but no problem there, as most of the latest applicants are ex-independents who don’t have a clue how to run a business in times like these.
There has to be a good point about everything, and maybe COVID reappearing will flush out all of the weeds and chaff from the genuine girls.
We are still taking applications from new girls, who will be wondering which way to turn in these precarious times of furloughed wages and the subequent fall in living standards.
Check out the ESCORT JOBS page if you wanted to apply.
We look forward to extending our clients in a ‘sex bubble’, but meanwhile, happy bookings to everyone!